I awoke one day and slithered out of the pond.

It was at this time I knew ... that lizards were the superior race. I shifted my vision to the left and to the right, uncontrollably, I slurped a fly into my mouth, and low and behold a snake kicked me in the face!

I found a sword and shield lay nearby at the base of a tree. I equipped them, and then vowed undoubtedly that all snakes must eternally die. And gnomes, because there was one in the distance staring at me creepily...